A bad friend is worse than an enemy. Our people will always say.
This topic reminds me of my primary school peom.
"When you choose friends becareful, some friends are good some are bad, if friends are bad aviod them all. Better for those that have good friends".
The worst mistake I make while I was younger, that was during my secondary school days, was telling my friend then things about my personal life. Guess what? I end up hearing everything I told her in another person's mouth. But I do keep everything we share together as a secret, I have never share her own gist to anyone.
That was friendship in the mud.
Becoming an adult, I have take charge of so many things in my life, I only share what I will like to hear outside because I have learned that if you want anything to be a secret, you better don't say it at all.
It doesn't mean that there are not still good friends out there. Currently, I have seen a friend who matches the same energy as mine, we like almost the same thing and dislike almost the same thing, she is like my soul sister and I cherish her. She is slow to speaking and slow to anger.
There are still good friends who can be there for you.
And I feel you get to know who the real friends are as you get older and wiser.
As a friend too I owe the other party loyalty, love and care because I shouldn't be expecting what i'm not given out, I have a very vital role to play so as to grow the friendship.
This is my advice to people that are choosing friends or finding it hard to keep friendship, this same advice is what I would have given to my younger self.
👉Do not be fast in choosing friends, if possible study people from afar before getting close to them, do not be fast in speaking and always listen. Hold a conversation on a topic and check your friend's response. Having a conversation with people makes you to know who they really are. Don't judge people base on what you heard, get close to know them first.
👉Go for a friend that matches your energy, not someone who will misunderstand everything you say, someone who is not envious of your success and a friend who motivates you to do harder. Choose a friend that you are free with, and can share your pains and be relief, a problem solver, not a friend who will always exposed you to wars and failures.
👉 lastly, love yourself first, people only treat you based on how you present yourself to them, never you feel inferior about yourself because low self esteem leads to low self efficacy. Also if you want love and peace , charity they say begins at home; give out what you expect, don't be negative and expect positivity.
