What is nost suitable? Living together or i separation?

in voilk •  2 days ago


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    Being a single man and having a plethora of fantasies, the idea of living in separate home with just my newly wed wife looks so good and romantic. There will not be any need of hesitation while kissing your wife in kitchen or creating intimate moments on lounge sofa. Just a couple and their passionate love. This is what a single man like me thinks.

    Many married ones may jump into my comment box telling me “come out of dillemma ,no such world exists”. Ok ok you may be right obviously you have experience but let me live with my false delusions as I am habitual of it. I have remained in many such delusions in my life sometimes about person or moment or an event. So why not to have one more.

    Among many reasons of isolation from joint family, freedom of quality moments will be at pinnacle. Usually people opt separation from joint family to avoid family conflicts, to enjoy quality time with partner and kids and to arrange better life commodities. Both separate and joint family system have tgeir own benefits and drawbacks. Some may be ahead in one aspect but may be lagging behind in another.

    The culture of indian subcontinent usually favours joint family system but how long you can confine a mushrooming family. Obviously at one time or another,someone will have to separate to spare some space and to get rid of conflicts as well.

    I belong to a separate family system . I do not live with uncles or cousins. My four uncles along with their families live together in a single Haveli. Sometimes I see them cheering while at other moment I realize there is no privacy there as well. In our house,we have enough space and privacy. I am eldest most so none of my siblings is married yet. As a family we share very quality time. We giggle ,eat together and have gossips. Our dinner time is fixed and we all have dinner at that time talking about our daily life routine.


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    But after marriage obviously many things change. Insertion of one new member exerts greater influence as further expansion of family is inevitable. I want to spend quality time with my parents. I want to serve when they will need me most. But along with that I cannot sabotage rights of my spouse and my children. They owe the right of living in a separate house that belongs to them only.

    I am not sure exactly but whenever my wife will ask me to have a separate home, I will definitely do that because it will be good for both sides. Not only it will improve my bond with my wife but it will also provide encouraging and complacent atmosphere to kids.

    The population of Pakistan is mushrooming so rapidly. If the current ratio continued , we will be a 400 million country by 2050 which is really an alarming situation. Possessing limited resources and declining economy we cannot bear such a burgeoning population. The youth which used to be our main strength is turning into a burden due to lack of opportunities. Population brings in good results if resources are ample but in the scarcity of resources large population becomes reason for many downtrends.

    I will choose to have a short but healthy family rather than choosing huge but mentally,physically, psychologically ,economicall and socially astray family.

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