When my daughter and I relocated back to Delta state, I had gone to make enquiry at Delta careers college. Although the school is quite a distance from my home, I had resolved to be using the school bus.
Imagine my shock when I was asked by the head teacher if my baby is going to be a boarder. I was confused and had to inform her again that she's just four years old so which one is boarding school for a baby??
She smiled and responded back saying even children younger than her get enrolled with them as boarders. The way I shouted ha! because why? why should a baby be isolated from parental care as such tender age? like she knew what was going through my mind, she smiled and responded that some parents got really busy schedules other times the children might be from broken homes and the parents must have moved on with their lives.
That did not really sit well with me because for me I'd rather drop my child off with a relative than to ship her off to a boarding school at such tender age.
I do understand that there comes a time in our life when we have to make the ultimate sacrifice in other to move on to the next level. For me that sacrifice is my sleep and I am currently suffering the consequences.
Initially I use to get at least 8hours of sleep im every 24hours. But as I take up more income stream I find myself stealing into my sleep time. It's s so bad that I currently have just 4 hours of sleep left. So recently, my sister asked me if I could take up a writing gig as a ghost writer and I told her yes.
She was like are you sure you can do it? what time do you have? because I currently work two jobs and then there is hive making it the third. She sees that I am struggling and she needed to be sure I could handle a fourth so I told her not to worry I got it all under control and then she asked me "how?".
I kept quiet, in my mind, I went, "this girl is not letting me fly that easily." So I told her I will cut into my sleep time and take 2hours off.
She went "hmmmmm...." and the proceeded to asking me "how many hours of sleep do you have now?" I didn't want to say but I had no choice so I told her 4hours and she exclaimed then went "ha! Don't worry, you can't do the job."
As much as I wanted to revolt and then patronize her to give me the gig I knew she was right because already, I am starting to see things that are not there. My brain is starting to skip and that is It warning me that I am pushing myself too far. So imagine now if I take of another 2 hours of sleep and now left with 2hours to sleep in all of 24hours? I might just land myself in a psychiatric home.
I knew I had to call myself to order when my daughter missed her midterm test because I had thought I read midterm break in the school memo. Or was it on two occasions now I wanted to purchase some items and pay with cash transfer? first transaction was twenty thousand, eight hundred Naira only but I had sent twenty eight thousand Naira I was lucky to get a reversal immediately from the vendor as it was a local market.
The one that happened recently, instead of three thousand five hundred Naira only, I had transferred thirty five thousand Naira and was also lucky to get a reversal after three days.
Or was it Yesterday I had diluted my face cleanser with some water as it was making my face too light in complexion, I had wanted to shake it to mix before using as I had thought I covered it but the cover was just on the ironing table escaping my minds eye and that was how aome content poured out of the bottle and soiled the ironing table.
Other times I find myself going the opposite direction and then realizing I am in the wrong route after few drive.
I do know how important sleep is for my mental health and at the same time I need to be able to finance my necessities. It's a really tough trade off for me.
Thank you for reading....