All of us love to see Before and After comparison results. How far have we come, what improvements we have made, how things have changed, we love to see them side by side. Some get pleased with the progress they have made, and sometimes we do feel sad for the good days we have left behind.
Let's rewind back to the days two years ago, how beautiful the atmosphere was! Still, the atmosphere is good, just not for me.
People who used to pamper me thousands of times in a single day are daring to raise their voices against me. The fear of my anger used to make them terrified even before making me angry and now that I have changed myself from those habits have backfired on me pretty hard. hard. Now I need to digest things that are just not appropriate for me, at least I don't deserve. Nothing to do, gotta be silent just to not make things any worse.
I know the root of everything, just not being able to acquire that. It's miles away from me. The more I am trying to get closer, the more distance it is sliding away from me. It's like a magnet with a similar charge, usually, the opposite-charged portion attracts one another and gets attached. Here it's sliding away on and on, all I am waiting for is to turn over suddenly and get attached to me. I know that only this can help me out with most of the mess that is scattered right now.
Back to the changes, I am not the old me who used to show temper even with the slightest mistake. Now, I do handle things with a smile, I know that after a few hours, it won't matter anymore, max a few days in the worst-case scenario. The fun fact is, I do still feel the warmth, like a sleeping lava that hasn’t burst yet but may do suddenly. I just try my best not to burst out, sometimes I get out of control and things get messy pretty badly.
I really wanna go back to my old self, and fix a few things, life wouldn’t have been this much struggling if a few things had worked differently. Well, I am seeing a few for that luck had favored generously, only Allah knows what my faults were or this is the blessing I am living instead of much worse situations. Sometimes, I drown in frustration and sometimes I calm myself saying things could have been even more messy than this. Good days are ahead for sure, let's not break here, a long way to go, and we gotta stay strong till then.
How do you see yourself a few years back? Do you miss the old you? I guess we all do but the thing is, how's life compared to that? Are you satisfied or struggling like me to cope with the mental trauma that comes from materialistic problems? May we all ease our problems and live with the things that make us happy and satisfied.
Have a great day,
Take Care!