（日本語は後半にあります）
【English】
The wind is still a bit chilly, but it is totally spring outside. This year, there have been many rainy days since the latter half of March, and I think it has been difficult to feel the arrival of spring. By today, more than half of the cherry blossoms have already fallen.
I don't know if it's the weather or a disruption in my daily rhythm, but I've been feeling a bit down lately. I am not sick or anything, but I feel tired, sleepy, and have a headache every day. I also feel depressed and agitated easily because of the lack of energy in my body, and I am troubled by it.
I decided to start by going to bed early, and I had been preparing to do so since last evening in order to go to bed by 10:00 p.m. However, I ended up having to scold my elder son for about two hours after that, and it was around midnight when I went to bed.
My son was depressed, but I was pretty depressed too... I went to sleep in the worst mood after that and did not wake up well this morning. Furthermore, that elder son dropped his coffee cup and broke it in the morning, making it a lazy start to the day as well. It is difficult to break the negative chain that continues to linger.
Recently, I have realized that the body and mind are one. My body is quite healthy, but because I have always disliked exercise and my indoor tendency has accelerated over the past few years (too much time spent on my phone and PC), I have a sense that I am gradually becoming weaker or losing strength. I don't like to say it, but it's probably due to my age. And if the body is not healthy, the mind is not healthy either, and confidence in many things is lost. I am depressed when I see slander on X that has nothing to do with me at all...
To begin with, I have too many things I want to do digitally and on the Internet. I will have to give up something as I can't very well do it in this current state. But first of all, tonight is the night I'm going to go to bed early and get my energy back.
Also, I should take a medical checkup this year as soon as possible, which I couldn't take last year because of the insurance switchover while I kept putting it off. With these thoughts in mind, I walked through the brightly lit park. The tulips lined up in rows were too cute.
【Japanese】
まだ風はひんやりですが、外はすっかり春です。今年は3月後半から雨の日が多く、春の訪れを感じにくかったような気がします。既に桜も半分以上散ってしまいました。
天候のせいか、生活リズムのせいか、このところどうも元気がでません。。どこか悪いとかではないのですが、だるい、眠い、頭が痛い、毎日そんな感じです。そして身体が元気じゃないせいか、気分的にも落ち込んだり、動揺したりしやすく、困っています。
これじゃいかん、まずは早く寝ることから始めようと、昨夜は22時までに就寝すべく夕方からその準備していました。ところが、結局その後長男を2時間ほど説教しなければならない羽目になり…やはり就寝は0時を回ってしまいました。
長男は落ち込んでいましたが、私もかなり落ち込みました… で、そのまま眠りについたので、今朝の目覚めも良くなくて。さらにその長男が朝からコーヒーカップを落として割り、今朝もぐだぐだなスタートとなりました。ダラダラと続く負の連鎖を、なかなか断ち切ることができません。
このところ、やはり身体と心はひとつだなぁと実感しています。私は身体はかなり頑丈な方なのですが、もともと運動が嫌い、かつここ数年でインドア傾向が加速している（スマホ、PCに触れている時間が多過ぎる）せいで、徐々に弱っているというか、力が出なくなっているような感覚があります。あんまり言いたくないけど、年齢もあるかな… あるよね。そして身体が元気ないと、心も元気でないし、色んなことに対して弱気になります。Xで全然自分に関係ない誹謗中傷を見て凹んだりしてます… これじゃ命いくつあっても足りないのでは😅
そもそもデジタル、インターネット上でやりたいことが多過ぎて困っちゃうのですが。今のこの状態ではとてもできないので、今夜こそ早く寝て、元気を取り戻すことから始めようと思います。
あと、去年はグズグズしているうちに保険の切り替えで受けられなくなってしまった健康診断を早めに受ける！そんなことを考えながら、明るい公園を歩きました。ズラリとならんだチューリップが可愛すぎでした。
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