Mixing business with love can really be complicated, especially when you are not aware of the emotional implications. Recently, I had a business agreement with a close friend, and she walked me through the right process without any emotions attached.
She said, Nkem, this is business; can we ignore the fact that we are friends so we can achieve something from the business plan? She asked me to give her my business plan to look into, which I did, and she asked me lots of questions so she could understand the business vividly, after which she gave her advice and then drafted a unique business agreement with terms and conditions and the consequences for any party that breached the agreement. I took my time to go through the thorough business agreement before signing it, and we called it a deal.
The thought of the implications of breaching the business agreement is enough to make me stay deliberate about the business all through. After that stage, I reflected on how I have been handling my past investments with friends and family with so much emotion and the negative implications so far. I wish I knew better, but it's good that I am aware now. What happens when you attach love to your business dealings with a partner, friends, or family members is that you stand a chance of risking the success of the business. Though not for everyone, some people can be good anyway.
From my experience so far, most people are reluctant when they know that they are dealing with their loved ones in business; some of them use the capital anyhow and lack accountability; after all, there's no legal back; in other words, you won't have the heart to sue the person or jail him or her for misuse of funds.
One of my experiences in this regard is with my in-law. He called and suggested a good investment in his line of business and explained how profitable it can be. I asked my mom, who has had experience with the same business in the past, and she said it's a good investment but requires huge capital. I talked to my husband about it, and we released money to this man without any sort of agreement. The trust was there—anything just to help him earn too, not knowing that I was going to lose our hard-earned savings to the so-called investment. After 6 months, this man started working on his abandoned house project, fixing new doors and windows, putting up a ceiling, and plastering the house. I was like, Wow, this young man is progressing in his business. But then I kept asking him about the investment and if the value was increasing, and he kept assuring me that all was well.
After one year, when I heard that the product had actually increased so much in value, I called him and requested that he sell the product, divide the profit into two, and return my capital with the profit. Surprisingly, that was when he started coming up with complicated stories that I couldn't process. According to him, he was owing some people money and decided to pay them off since they were giving him lots of pressure and then buy mine later with some cash he was expecting from lots of products he ordered from the north,but unfortunately he lost the product through an accident as the load was coming back to the east. Upon hearing this story, I didn't know if I should arrest him, force him to produce the money, or whatever. But then I blamed myself for realizing I had given investment money to an in-law without any form of agreement. To be sincere, it didn't even cross my mind to do the needful; I was clouded with emotions; after all, he is my in-law. But then, my spirit strongly told me that he used the money to finish up his building, but then, I have no evidence, no written agreement, and I didn't want to do anything that would ruin our relationship. I thought of how his kids and mine usually play along and keep bonding. I thought of a possible repercussion considering family if I should take up the case, and the whole thing made me weak.
This happened like 5 years ago when the economy was still a bit better, but I can't forget my stupidity in a hurry. The lost money did affect my family then, but it was an experience that taught me a hard lesson. I later locked up my heart to doing tangible business with close relatives, but recently, I have learned that emotions and business aren't a great combo, and also setting boundaries should be inevitable. so I am willing to do it again, but this time, get things right, legally document them, and follow business rules as if I don't know what love means anymore when dealing with family, friends, partners, or relatives in business.
Ps: all images were taken from canva
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