This sounds exactly like what you'd expect to hear if I didn't know what I was doing

in voilk •  4 months ago

    No dreams to report today.

    Not sure if that's good or bad.

    I spent most of the day in a fairly decent mood, likely because I wasn't hungover.

    If anyone at work ever asks me if I'm single, I'm going to respond with the following:

    "Hardly. Every night, I fall asleep in the arms of despair. The way she holds me, it's like she never wants to let go."

    Truly heartwarming.

    I'm a bit surprised I haven't been fired yet.

    I've made a lot of horribly inappropriate jokes in front of people who might have taken offense.

    Yelled at a few people for half-assing their jobs.

    If my workplace crush isn't interested, then she wouldn't have made furtive eye contact like that in passing as I was on my way out for the day.

    Right?

    Right.

    At least that's what I'm telling myself.

    @chaoticthoughts out.

    ✌️ 🤟 🤘


    Today's stats:

    • pushups: 16
    • crunches: 20
    • steps: 14,813
    • beers: 3
    • badly timed awkward glances: 1

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