It seems very difficult when you find the past eating away at the future, or when you find yourself torn between the two, ultimately losing both and you haven't done anything.
In fact, when I sat down with myself, I found that I think about the past a lot, imagining things and choices that happened and wishing they hadn't happened, or wishing I could change those decisions. All of this is useless and without any effect. I feel that time is passing, and not only is the future eating away at me, but I also feel distressed and anxious.
The distress caused by overthinking the past and the decisions I've made is one of the most dangerous things I face daily, and it makes my day absolutely unhappy. This, incidentally, isn't a particular problem. When I started focusing on my conversations with some of my friends, I found that 80% of them were about the past, whether things they did that were good or bad decisions, while thinking about the future doesn't take up any of our lives.
We are, in fact, prisoners of our past, and we can't solve this except by realizing that there really is a problem, that there is something called time, which passes quickly and waits for no one, and that what has passed will only return in science fiction movies. Therefore, strive to change your future through your past, because the opposite will never happen, no matter how hard you try.
The Solution
In fact, I discovered through psychoanalysis that the reason for this is that we do this involuntarily. Thinking about the future requires planning and thus mental effort, which is something your mind doesn't want to do. Whereas thinking about the past is simply retrieving certain things from memory, which is relatively easier for your mind.
Initially, I found that the solution was to acknowledge the problem and tell yourself that there is nothing to change in the past, so there's no need to dwell on it too much. Then, try to focus on the present moment. I found this through mindfulness exercises, which will make you more realistic with the present moment.
Finally, I started trying to set new plans and goals for the future to occupy myself with and divide them into short-term plans and long-term plans, as well as investing time in new hobbies and skills. This will help a lot when you find yourself accomplishing tasks and acquiring new skills, as your mind will automatically get used to moving forward and will not look back.
