Influence Children, Who Pulls The Strongest Influence?

in voilk •  4 months ago

    images (2).png
    image source

    Had this conversation on another platform and thought it'd be great to share here.

    Happy reading!

    Determining who has the strongest influence on children may not be absolute to an individual or group as every interaction children have with different people can influence them either positively or negatively.

    One can easily say that children will be most influenced by the person or people they spend most of their time with, in this case, we can argue for or in favour or the teacher(s) or parents (more may tilt towards the teachers given that an average child spends more of their time daily at school), however, people who children meet for even an hour can have great influence on the child on either side of the spectrum.

    That established, it is important to know that all of the mentioned people here form children's social environment which play a very pivotal role in their development. We can therefore argue that they all influence children in different ways.

    How does a father have a strong influence on children?

    It is naturally believed, especially in societies that oriented on patriarchy, that men should have a strong, if not the strongest influence on children, especially if that child is a boy.

    Fathers are expected to influence children in terms of believing that the responsibility of making provisions for the family is theirs. They influence children by leading from the front and by example, showing that a man takes charge.

    Another influence a father can have on children is that of respect. Men naturally like to command respect, hence, children may be influenced to believe that they have to be respected, again, especially if they're boys. Girls also get influenced because they believe their fathers are also learning points for them and so they should be respected and this is growing more by the day with the advent of western feminism.

    Another very strong influence that fathers can have on children is on how a woman is to be treated. This can either make or mar how boys see girls and even how girls see themselves.

    A boy raised by a father who respects females is more likely to grow up to respect them than a boy whose father never did.

    A girl whose father never respected her mother or any female at that, may grow to believe that women are not to be respected, hence, develop low self esteem and on the other extreme, especially if they grow to know the opposite, become toxic against men who do not respect women.

    How does a mother have a strong influence on children?

    In African societies as a case study, mothers influence on children cannot be underestimated as it is believed that along with fathers, mothers are the first learning points for children. They make children understand that taking care of the home is very important as this is the best way to build the family and society at large. Ensuring that the family stays together is a big influence that mothers have on children. They make children believe in taking responsibilities, doing chores, etc.

    The interesting thing about mothers' influence is that it can easily rub off on both genders, especially in terms of taking care of the home. Children get to learn more about chores and keeping the family together from their mother.

    While it is believed that this is naturally more beneficial to female children, male children who grow to imbibe this habit would turn out to be an asset for the society.

    How does the teacher have a strong influence on children?

    Because children spend averagely more of their time at school, teachers are expected to form a strong influence on them. While this is true to a very large extent, I believe the strongest form of influence teachers can have on children is in terms of academics and how serious they take their studies. This is not to say that children cannot learn morality and whatnot from their teachers, but having heard so many life stories about the influence of teachers which mostly are on the academic side, hence my submission.

    This influence basically determines how a child sees, loves or hates a particular subject or topic and education as a whole. Some children are traumatised by experiences with their teachers that make them hate or love some subjects, one that easily comes to mind is mathematics. I can't count the number of people I've met who either got to love or hate the subject due to the influence of their subject teachers.

    How do siblings have a strong influence on children?

    Siblings are another level of influence on children, especially at home, although, I believe this influence may not be as strong as those of their parents. Nonetheless, it forms a good part of the influence that shapes their life.

    This is also because their the closest form of socialisation children have growing up and their ability to relate with their siblings can have an effect on how they relate with the larger society.

    One important way I can think of this influencing children is role-modelling. Children tend to learn from what their siblings do, especially older siblings. They look up to them to learn how to behave.

    Having good older siblings should ordinarily influence children positively, it could also have the reverse effect, if they are not able to meet up, leading them to think low of themselves and believing they're not good enough just because they can't matchbtheir siblings. Some parents do bit also help this by drawing comparison among siblings.

    How do friends have a strong influence on children?

    The influence of friends on children becomes more apparent as they grow older. The type of friends children keep affect their behaviour and can sometimes overshadow what they have learnt from school or home. This is particularly more prevalent in older children, who are able to discern and believe they can make decisions from themselves.

    When children learn from their friends, it can simply be referred to as peer influence. The extreme of this is called peer pressure.

    Peer pressure can simply be looked at as the influence on children by those who are believed to be in their age group. They begin to think if their peers can do or get away with something, same shouldn't be otherwise for them.

    In the light of this, it is very important that parents painstakingly ensure that their children move with the right set of friends who will be good influence on them. Hence the popular saying, "show me your friends and I'd tell you who you are".

    Conclusively...

    The gender of the child also sometimes plays into who is expected to have the strongest influence on them. In most societies, it is expected that boys are influenced by their fathers and the girls by their mothers.

    Regardless of this thinking, all mentioned parties have great influence on children and it may be difficult to single out an individual who has more influence, as they all have influence, only in different capacities.

      Authors get paid when people like you upvote their post.
      If you enjoyed what you read here, create your account today and start earning FREE VOILK!