Tears ran down her cheeks even as she was wheeled into the theatre. They ran still as she was injected with anaesthesia and darkness covered her eyes. She cried because she knew what was going to befall her baby even before she woke up to see the kind-faced, middle-aged doctor, together with the nurses, giving her sad, pitying looks. And when they said, “I’m sorry, ma’am. The baby was stillborn,” she had no tears in her eyes. Her Valentine's baby was no more.
And so, Cecilia asked for water to wash her face. She washed her hands, cleaned her face, thanked the surgery team and began to head home. The doctor ran after her and held her hand.
“It’s not the end of the world, you know. You can try again.”
Cecilia smiled mirthlessly. She saw the fear in the doctor’s eyes and knew she was probably thinking she would kill herself. True, this had been the fourth time and just like other times, she thought it would be different. Covering the doctor’s hands with hers, she said. “I won’t kill myself, Doctor. As far as there is life, there is hope.” She turned then as soon as she said that and walked briskly away. She had seen the tears in the Doctor’s eyes and she didn’t want the emotions already rising in the pits of her stomach to overwhelm her.
When Cecilia got home and opened the door, she began to gather clothes into her little travelling bag.
“Where are you going?” Kevin asked from the corner of the door.
“Just away,” Cecilia replied quietly. She wasn’t going to look up at him, lest the anger that had been bubbling in her heart like a volcano erupted. The person that had helped put that life in her hadn’t been there through that gruesome experience. For the fourth time.
“When are you going to get back?” he asked.
She fought to remain calm. “Not sure. I just need to get away for a bit.”
“Do I need to come with you?” She looked at him then, long and hard so that he recoiled instantly. “I guess that’s a no.” He walked off then, without looking back.
The cheers were joyful, the noise, frantic.
“Aunt, Cece. You’re here!” The kids screamed as they surrounded her with smiles, hugging her and tugging at her dress.”
Cecilia’s heart was immediately uplifted. She forgot how calming being here, having these children around, made her. After passing around the chocolate bars and little boxes of sandwiches that she’d made them, they dispersed to the garden to eat their treats, skipping across the field, with laughter as joyous as a host of angels, encompassing them.
“They are a delight to behold, aren’t they?” A cheery voice called from behind her. Cecilia turned to see Martha, her Godmother and manager of the orphanage home, she and her Mom had built.
“Yeah,” she answered, hugging her. “They are like little angels.” Turning to Martha, she asked. “How’s everything, Aunt? Have things been going well? Anything you need? Any child causing you to worry?”
Martha chucked in response. “A thousand questions a minute. Just like your Mama.”
Cecilia smiled wanly and let Martha guide her towards the garden. It was there she saw her, seated at the far edge of the garden, short and skinny with a gorgeous mane of red hair. She had a faraway look on her face and a scowl on her brow like whatever running through her mind was upsetting her deeply. Her eyes met Cecilia’s then. So briefly, Cecilia felt like she must have imagined it. And quick as a flash, the girl dashed away.
“Who is she?” She asked Martha, absently.
“That’s Vida. Our newest one. Brought in by the cops four weeks ago. There had been a robbery at her home.” There was a pregnant pause. “She witnessed it all,” Martha ended with a choked sob.
Cecilia was overcome with grief. “Oh no, Aunt. Is she okay?”
Martha shrugged, taking a minute to wipe her eyes. “She never talks to anyone. She sits there for hours on end. I’ve tried to make her open up, Cece. Trust me, I have.”
Cecilia felt an overwhelming urge to follow Vida then. And so she kissed Martha on her papery cheek and began searching frantically for the little girl with fiery hair. She scanned the length and breadth of the vast building situated at the hilltop. And just when she lost hope and was about to phone Martha to organise a search party, she saw her by the edge of the cliff, arms outstretched and in that moment, Cecilia knew she was going to throw herself off the cliff.
“Vida! No!!” she screamed as she ran towards her. The girl turned towards her in alarm and lost her footing for a second. She gave her a frightened look as her hands flayed, trying to regain herself. Cecilia caught her then, firmly and surely and pulled her up. They collapsed on the ground together, panting heavily as the impact of what almost happened replayed in their minds.
“What were you thinking?” Cecilia whisper-yelled.
Vida chuckled. “Nothing. I just felt like I could fly for a moment.”
“You weren’t trying to jump off the cliff?” The alarmed look on the girl’s face was all she needed to see. She hadn’t been trying to kill herself. She, on the other hand, had almost made it happen. “It’s too risky to be out here though. Please, don’t do it again.”
Vida gave her a searching look like she was contemplating if she could be trusted. Satisfied with whatever she must have seen on her face, she gave a huge nod. They were silent for a moment. A comfortable kind of silence. And then Vida spoke. “Today’s my birthday, you know.”
Cecilia beamed at her. “That’s just wonderful, you Valentine’s baby.”
Vida grinned but then her face fell. “I just want to smile today. I’m trying to forget everything, and I know it’s something I may never achieve. But, I hope that at least today, I’ll go to bed with a smile.”
Cecilia looked at her and instantly knew why she had felt compelled by her spirit to be here on the day of love. This was where she needed to be.
“Why, then let’s help you fulfil that wish.” She stood up and held out her hand. “Come with me. I’ll bake you the biggest cake you could ever imagine.”
Vida squealed in delight, the look of maturity that had been etched on her face, giving way to childlike innocence. “Really??!!”
“Yes, really.” But then she remembered something and immediately whipped up her phone and dialled a number. “I won’t be coming back, Kevin.”
“Wait, what do you mean?” he asked from the other end of the line.
“Exactly what I said. I’ve found home now and I plan to remain here. Happy Valentine’s Day to you.”
“Wait,” he called out but she already hung up. Looking brightly at Vida who still had beatific smiles trained at her, she grinned at her. And hand in hand, they walked back to the orphanage home. Both unknowingly liberated from the demons they faced.
Jhymi🖤
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