Today started on a good note for me, but now I'm getting ready to go to bed feeling more angry than I've ever been in a while.
Unfortunately, I won't be sharing details of the exact thing that ended up ruining my mood because it is something personal, rather I would be talking about how I've been trying to control myself and how it sucks a lot.
If you're a frequent reader of my content, then you probably must have read in one or two blogs where I talked about how hot tempered I get whenever I get offended and how my defense system has always been to cut people off and not talk to them again or for a long time.
I also recently talked about how I've been trying to not do that anymore because although it give results and prevents whatever it was that got me upset from repeating itself, that's not exactly a healthy way of handling issues.
Well, I've been trying to communicate with people instead, so you can consider today's post kinda like a report of how that has been going. And if I have to explain it using very few words, it hasn't been going well at all.
And the reason for that is that I've come to realize that when you try to communicate with someone after they've offended you, they don't know how to take accountability for their actions. It's almost as if they have this mentality that just because you're talking to them about it gives them some kinda opening to argue back with you and not just accept that they're wrong even when the entire situation clearly shows that they are.
Unlike the silent treatment that I'm used to, where I don't seek any form of apologies from them or whatever, I just move on and act like they've stopped existing to me... Communicating is very hard and this is because the more these people argue, the more upset and violent I want to get.
Because I've come to find out that if there's one thing I hate more than getting pissed off by someone based on what they did to me, it is them lying about doing that stuff when I approach them about it.
So guys, trying to talk it out hasn't been working so well for me, but the good news is that I haven't fought with anyone yet so I guess that means I still have a lot of control over myself.
Hopefully it doesn't get to that, because I would rather choose the silent treatment than to raise my hands on anyone.