There's this saying "You never value what you have until you lose it."
Well, I never really understood this quote until about 8 years ago, when I realized the importance of what "family" meant.
I was a teenager meandering my way through life, observing and understanding its principles.
"We'll be paying your aunty a visit." My mum said a certain day.
"Really?" I replied in excitement.
"When are we going?" I continued, my eyes widened like that of an expectant owl.
"Just after your Jamb examinations."
We were both travelling in a few days time to a distant state(Enugu) where I was to write an examination (JAMB) that would qualify me for an entrance into the university to study my desired course.
"We'll stay for a day before heading back home." She said. "But if you want, you can stay longer before coming back. I..."
"I'll stay for some extra weeks" I quickly cut in. My mum was dumbfounded at the speed in which I replied without hesitation, as though I had been dreaming for a moment like this.
"Hmmm... Alright. But after the first day, I'll be coming back here because of my work, so you'll literally be alone for those few weeks."
"I really don't mind" I said, shrugging my shoulders and arching my eyebrow with innocence.
She stared at me for a moment, she sort of seemed surprised at how willing and gleeful I was at the forthcoming visit which I truly anticipated.
Indeed, my heart was filled with joy and ecstasy — I needed a break from home, my Mum, and the life I was used to. I don't know if I actually desired the visit or I just needed an escape from home.
We hit the road, driving towards Enugu state for my examinations. I sat at the passenger seat while my Mum drove.
I watched through the window as hills and mountains slid by with a speed faster than that of light.
"You seem so excited" my Mum said.
"I'm not really excited, I'm just there."
She laughed and turned her head sideways, towards me. "I know you're running from me." She said in a playful tone.
"Running?" I exclaimed. "Why would I want to do that?" I asked.
"Hmm... Nothing much, don't mind me." She kept on steering the driving wheel, but deep down she knew just how bad I wanted to leave. She couldn't be fooled by my fake expressions.
We eventually arrived and I wrote the examination which turned out to be a success. We paid a visit to my Aunt's house where we ate, drank and laughed. It was eventually time for my mum to leave. She stood from the table where we all dined...
"Alright... it's time to take my leave, I have a lot to handle back at home." She said, staring at my Aunt whose eyes were filled with life.
"Eme, my baby boy! I'll miss you." She said, turning towards me.
She gave me a tight hug then walked towards the exit while I watched every single step of her's. My smiling face transitioned into an expressionless one, which slowly carved into a sad one. Tears suddenly brimmed my eyes but I fought hard not to let it out.
"Emeka please could you help us wash the dishes." My Aunt told me the next day - something I happily did. I mean, I didn't want to throw my lazy ass around the house without doing something.
From washing the dishes to washing her husband's and children's clothes, I began working harder than I even did at home. I'd pick the children up after school hours, wash their clothes, prepare their meals, and give them a shower. I literally turned to a house maiden.
My eyes sought sleep but found none, my body sought rest but found stress. Days seemed like weeks and weeks seemed like months.
The peak of it all was when I worked from morning to night a certain day, it was close to 11pm and I was asked to prepare a meal as against the next day. I subconsciously fell into the hands of sleep while the food slowly turned into spikes of charcoal.
"Emeka!! what are you doing?" A familiar voice angrily screamed.
I jolted from the little stool where I dozed off. It was my Aunty's voice.
"I was tired, sorry ma" I apologetically replied, meanwhile... She frantically opened the pot, trying to douse the fuming smoke which billowed right out of the burnt pot.
"Don't you know food is quite expensive these days? what's your problem!"
"I was..."
"Why are you so lazy?" She quickly cut in.
I kept mute for some seconds. Nothing had ever hurt me as much as this statement. I could physically feel the pain right in my chest. I mean, if there was anyone that was to be called lazy, it wasn't meant to be me.
I ran into the room the next day, put a call through to my mum.
"Hello, Mummy, I want to come back."
"You can't come back yet. We told her you'll be staying for atleast 3 weeks."
"She doesn't allow me to take a nap, I'm always..." I went on and on, narrating my endless story while she listened and encouraged me.
Well, it was time to get back home, something I anticipated with much glee. I boarded a commercial bus, my aunt bade me farewell and squeezed some notes of cash into my slim hands. I waved at her through the window of the bus as it left while she waved back. We both had a smile on our faces but mine was for a different reason — freedom.
I finally arrived at the front of my house, looking at the building and the whole neighborhood as though they were new to me.
My mum opened the door, smiling. I hadn't even knocked yet. It was almost as though she instinctively knew I was around.
"You've seen that life isn't a bed a roses" She said, then giggled. I looked at her with a stern face but a relieved heart.
I stepped inside, the scent of freedom was evident, the same freedom I once thought to be a reproach. The air had a refreshing ambience that was quite soothing. For a moment I realized that there's no place like home.
"Never ever again will I spend a long vacation at any place other than home" I muttered to myself. I'd rather take abuses from my Mum, than from a stranger.
I guess the saying "blood is thicker than water" is true, and I came to the realization that in the end, family is all we've got!