It's funny how we are so obsessed with the idea that peer pressure is completely a terrible thing, and I want to believe the term turned out to be evil because we only use it when people are badly influenced by the things happening around them.
It is always attributed to negative influence, but it's the other way around when peer pressure brings good results, it's no longer pressure, and that's when you start hearing grammar-like inspiration and motivation getting the accolades for a success that was driven by peer pressure.
Recently, I saw a video of a young man online. He was celebrated for his success after embracing programming and despite mentioning that seeing his peers achieving success in that field forced him to learn and tap into the opportunity in the tech world, nobody attributed his success to peer pressure but when another man was caught after committing a hideous crime especially when money is involved, peer pressure takes the blame.
I was once in that shoe, I believe being under peer pressure was a terrible thing but a time came when I admitted that peer pressure is one of the things that fueled my desire to be successful in life.
It definitely doesn't sit well with people using "peer pressure" in their success story, but the truth remains that we have all been under peer pressure influence at a point in life, and because you weren't influenced negatively doesn't change the fact that you were under peer pressure.
Getting influenced by peer pressure is usually not the problem; it's as simple as just thinking of how well your peers are doing, and you feel like you can do the same, but your approach to getting that thing done is the big issue because it could be good or bad.
I mentioned in HL's first prompt this week about me being a big dreamer. I wanted to become different things at different times in life, all because of success. I saw my mate attending a good school and living in beautiful houses, and I would tell myself that I could achieve the same thing, even though not immediately.
The real goal was becoming successful, while those dreams were just channels to reaching that goal, and it's the same for many of us, but how we chase success turns out to be different.
After my education hit the stop point in 2009, I felt terrible because that wasn't my dream. I wanted to get educated and use my knowledge to change my story for good, but life said otherwise. At that time, 75% of my classmates and friends were done with their first year in the higher institution.
They came home during the holiday, and all their gists were about school, which I usually have nothing to contribute. I was just a primary school teacher taking multiple classes, including tutorials, just to support my family.
An incident happened in 2011 when I went to celebrate with a friend on his birthday, and while his father was celebrating with us, he started a conversation about school. Everyone was eager to contribute, and when the man asked where I was schooling, I stammered.
He just moved on to another person, and I felt like disappearing from that spot due to something he said that day. I couldn't wait for the end of the celebration before I left the gathering, and everything I could think of was that I needed to get into the university, but how?
I thought about it thoroughly and concluded that my job at that time wouldn't help me, so I quit. I faced home tutorials squarely, but the money wasn't enough, so I started looking for another job and got one that would take me far away from home.
I hopped on the job immediately, and despite the challenges, I had to cope because it was promising. I saw myself saving enough for school and just gave my all to the job. In 2013, I had saved a huge sum and started planning towards school. I worked for another year and finally got admitted into the university when my mates were graduating, but it was a dream come true for me. Peer pressure played a part, and I chose the right way to handle it.
Who knows if I wouldn't have been able to further my education if peer pressure didn't set in but here I am today. The knowledge and expeience from school have influenced my life positively so its a win for me with peer pressure.
Peer pressure, being multifaceted, is misunderstood by many, and I urge people to be careful with stigmatizing it. No problem when you deny it, but making others feel like peer pressure is a terrible thing can be dangerous. Instead of stigmatizing, it's better to help people understand that peer pressure is normal, and the most important thing is allowing it to influence us positively and not the other way around.
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