It's the first of the year and as is usual for me and probably, a large amount of humans, we make new year resolutions. Sometimes, we start to work towards them and then give up halfway. Other times, we don't start at all. And occasionally, we accomplish these resolutions.
During the last few days of 2024, I did some deep thinking and reflection on my life and the circumstances that has brought me to where I am. I made notes on my bad habits, good habits, mistakes, successes and failures and I did a critical analysis of how I could work towards the betterment of myself in the new year.
I realized that there are some things or habits that have been holding me back from realizing my full potential and from being a better me. Of which procrastination and laziness is a majoring factor.
Procrastination really got a hold of me last year. And it stemmed from me just being a lazy person generally. Of course, in 2023, I set goals and made resolutions for 2024. Unfortunately, i was only able to accomplish a few of them. Of course, I said I would do at least 20 squats daily and write daily. I said I would develop myself career-wise and just be the best in what I do. But I was too lazy to realize them fully. I noticed that I was fond of blaming my environment or circumstances for my laziness. I would lie to myself that I was too busy with school to focus on career but it was just laziness and lack of time management.
I realized that always procrastinating tasks or assignments I could do in the moment, led to pressure and cluttering. It led to me always stressing out and being in a rush and hurry to accomplish 100 tasks all in one sitting. And for someone trying to practice minimalism, it was not the ideal habit to have. I hope to shed it this new year. I think I already am, or it might be too early for me to judge. But I almost procrastinated writing this post till tomorrow, haha ¯\(ツ)/¯
Another thing I need to leave behind in 2024 is my constant need for others’ validation. The only validation I need is mine. My seeking to please others and always meet up to their expectations, took a toll on me. And I mean a huge one. In my attempt to do that, I was piling the weight of their expectations on mine and somehow, making them my own. And the few times it even earned me people's validation, I still wasn't satisfied. I came to realize, that it wasn't other people's love or acceptance that would fill the gaping abyss in me, but my own acceptance of myself, my limits, abilities and capabilities. I hope for 2025 to be a year where I find love in myself and the courage to truly be me.
Last year, I didn't really prioritize rest until the closing months. I used to take rest as a reward, instead of an activity I should engage in daily. It is probably because of the kind of country I live in where rest is a mysterious concept. Everyone is always on the move, hustling or grinding or just working towards one thing or the other. My country is never truly asleep. There's this saying that, ”the day you rest could be the day a life opportunity passes you by.” But, when I broke down last year to the point that physical exertion was a nightmare, I knew that rest isn't something I should toy with.
So, this year, I intend to take my rest seriously, just like I would take eating and breathing seriously. I intend to focus on both physical and mental rest, taking steps towards decluttering my every state of being. One of my top goal is to take life slowly and make conscious efforts towards enjoying and loving my life to the best of my ability. I intend to resist pressure and stress and the baggage that comes with them. This is why my theme for this year is “A Life of Ease.”
Thanks for reading and Happy New Year..🎉🥂