In this life, every human being is different. That's why I hate comparing myself with others. I may have a role model though, but I will never dream of being like the person but rather greater, so that I would be a role model too.
My father died when I was only ten. It wasn't easy for me to recover from the loss. I lived with my Dad alone because all my elder siblings were in the city and my mother had traveled too. My mom traveled to live with our inlaw who was blessed with a baby from my elder sister. It's a tradition in my place that when a lady gives birth to her first baby, the mother is expected to leave her home, visit her daughter and stay with her for at least four months. The mother's role is to help her daughter and teach her how to take off a delicate baby against her next delivery.
After my father's demise, I had no option but to leave our family house to live with my big brother in the city. This is the first son of my family. My father was an entirely different person from my brother. My father was an atheist. My brother worked as an Assistant Pastor in the city. He was vexed with the word of God and loved to see people around him pray and read their Bible all the time.
The day I parked in, I wanted to take my bath first and then rest from the three-hour journey that stressed my whole life out. I slept thrice on the bus which was taking us. When I entered the bathroom and wanted to take off my dresses, I heard a call, "Jonah, where are you? Come let's pray and thank God for the safe journey." I didn't want to give excuses, I put on my dresses and came out.
Source
As time went on, I tried watching movies with my phone but my big brother would always come to me and ask me," Have you read your Bible or prayed today?" I would always answer him no. This incident had repeated several times and I wished my brother could understand that it was just too difficult for me to pick up my Bible to read without compelling me or giving some words of advice.
After my brother had tried the "talking strategy" and it yielded him nothing, he employed the "action strategy". He later found out that it was difficult for me to read my Bible and pray. This was his "action strategy", he got my phone from me, my major distraction, and deleted all the games and videos, took away my SIM cards and changed the home WiFi password. The only software on my phone was the Bible app, PDF readers for my school activities and built-in apps like the clock, settings and other fun free apps.
The fact that reading my Bible and praying is one of the things I find difficult to do can't be changed. After he executed the "action strategy", I executed my "sleep strategy" too. Whenever I feel free or bored and I know that I need to watch movies, I would sleep off. Most times I would also try to read the Bible and pray but it would always seem as if I took the world's best sleeping pills.
My big brother has taught me that as a Christian, I need to often study the Bible and pray to boost my spiritual strength. I admire his teachings and believe what he says, but to practice it is a difficult thing for me. I am trying to adapt now, but I wish my big brother could understand that we are entirely different people. He is not my role model, therefore trying to do what he does best is a difficult thing for me.
I know that most of my readers here who share the same beliefs might also be going through the same difficulty.
Thanks for reading my story and I hope you have something to learn.
Posted Using InLeo Alpha