The other day via @dreemport, I came across @gregscloud post on week two of CWH prompt. Amongst the things he wrote, he hinted on last week being kindness week and it was a nice thought going extra with kindness as its something I just do on impulse but then since it's kindness week I thought why not be intentional with it and see how far you push? usually kindness for me is done to people who are nice to me and not people who intentionally do things to spite me as I believe in matching energy with energy lol. So what did I do this week to promote kindness?
First act of kindness I decided to exercise is to not yell at my daughter at the least provocation. She is a very opinionated child and most times I feel belittled as a parents when I tell her this is how it's done and she goes doing it her way insisting it must be done that way. It gets really annoying doing things with her so this week I decided I wont have any confrontation or fall out with her.
So we were working on her assignments for school and then I was guiding her but then she revolted that that's not how her teacher asked her to do it. I just picked up my phone and stood up telling her no problem do it on your own then. As I was about leaving she held my leg and went mommy I'm sorry teach me please. Ha! this one is a first lol usually we'd have gone into a banter on how she should do what I say and not her dictating to me, now she wants me to teach her? This is rich I said quietly.
Immediately I learned further on the principle of reverse psychology. I will no longer be quick to exercise authority as a parent, I have left that responsibility to her though not in all cases but we'd see how it goes.
Next act of kindness, I was going home from work in the evening. I boarded a mini bus waiting for it to get filled, I was seated at the back and the seat wasn't comfortable as rhe middle seat was resting directly on my leg but I had to manage it as I couldn't wait for the next turn to load. As I was seated at the back waiting for the two chance at the back to be filled, this woman came with her two children. She was carrying one on her back and dragging the other one with his school bag and lunch kit. She was also carrying a big hand bag and another sack bag, she was literally struggling and I felt for her.
She sat by me and was struggling to adjust with her load and her children and still create space for the next person that will occupy the third space. With the way she was struggling the next person won't be comfortable sitting close to her and the driver might ask her to come down and take the next turn seeing how its late and the children were already exhausted, I wouldn't want that for them as that will be a living nightmare.
I volunteered to help her with the bags, as inconveniencing as my space was and my legs were already crying, I created space by my side and kept her bags there, she became free from the luggages and had just the children to deal with which wouldn't be inconveniencing to the next person. I looked at her and the children and saw a little ease as she heaved a sigh of relief. Immediately it occurred to me I just let out an act of kindness. I then remembered it was kindness week as it had escaped
me.
My third act of kindness, it was Friday and I was headed home with my daughter from school, since it's weekend I decided to stop by the market and get some food items to cook.I needed to make soup and stew. I got to the shade of the vegetable vendor and she had lots of vegetables already bought that she was cutting for the respective owners. I selected the ones I wanted then stood and waited for her to cut and get to my turn. I had stood for over twenty minutes and my daughter was already exhausted I kept calming her down that it will soon get to our turn. Then it got to our turn, as our vegetables were being sliced, this woman came in from no where and the following conversation ensued between her and the vegetable vendor.
Are you done slicing my vegetables?
The Vegetable vendor looking confused and said, I thought you left already, besides you didn't pay for any vegetables for me to slice
But you know I always get vegetables from you, ok no problem from the one you are slicing now, give me three hundred Naira worth so I can be on my way because I cannot stand waiting for you to get to my turn.
I looked at the vegetable vendor and I looked at the woman like is this playing? I have been standing here for over twenty minutes with my little girl whose already exhausted from standing and this woman is here not even acknowledging me asking for my vegetables to be given to her? I was supposed to be angry after recounting these words in my head but I felt no anger to rage on, so I just kept quiet and watch as the vegetable vendor packed my vegetables for this woman.
I didn't know why I was calm but I was just quiet which was highly unlike me. But then I noticed the vegetables the vendor packed for the woman was quite small for the amount. I stood for some minutes and then she finished slicing mine and even added extra for me then went further to thank me and appreciated my calmness.
She said if it was some other people they would have yelled and it would have resulted to confrontations.
I am not usually calm when being oppressed but I just felt we are doing something different this week let me go extra and I'm really glad I did because staying calm shielded me from all the heartache and rush of anderaline that comes with exercising anger.
It was a really fun week for me and I appreciate @gregscloud for putting efforts into making kindness a community.
Thank you for reading and please do not hesitate to share an experience on kindness with us 🙂