๐ฆ๐ธ๐ป๐ญ ๐ซ๐ ๐ฝ๐ฑ๐ฎ ๐ช๐พ๐ฝ๐ฑ๐ธ๐ป
Beyond The Looking Glass is the second book in the Unseen series, a story that came to me from the other side. A story where I thought I was just the narrator until I heard the Words of the Unseen.
This second story goes beyond time and place and mixes the long ago with the here and now. Because history keeps repeating, until we learn and do something about it.
Beyond The Looking Glass - Words of the Unseen - Chapter 97
I even refuse to go for air. The look on their faces when I tell them that I really don't need to go outside in this dirty weather.
"But you're inside all day..," they start.
"Yes and I like that just fine, and if you want to leave me alone now I'm busy."
Isolation, it's the worst punishment they say. And that may be the case for many, but these days of involuntary confinement are, despite the uncertainty about what awaits me, a blessing.
After so many years of getting up, running, flying, falling, and continuing, I now have something that secretly I have been looking for for ages, Isolation.
I've never been able to meditate this much, and although I am very much aware of everything that awaits me, I can find and feel my core.
I feel peace.
I feel like they can take everything away from me, possibly they have already taken everything away from me, and I would still feel fine. To quote the Dutch eighties band Doe Maar "Is This All?"
Slowly I said goodbye to my worries.
I am no longer worried about losing everything, my job, my house, my son, my life as I know it.
It can all be taken away from me when even the little bit of freedom I have in this world comes to an end.
I realize that all too well here on this too-thin mattress with a thick plastic cover in a cell where I can't even turn off the light.
Yet I feel strong, much stronger. When you have nothing to lose there are only two ways to go.
You can give up and be the victim of unforeseen circumstances.
Or you look around you, realizing how light life is when all the ballast has been taken from you.
Effortlessly get up, face the world with open arms, and say... "Here I am, come and take me if you can, you can't get me anyway... take me if you can, because you'll never get me this way."
It took time, because till now I was my job, and my job is important because there are still debts.
But above all, there is my son... I don't want his mother to use this against me in the divorce.
But even if that were the case, what then?
I will be free one day, there will be a job again someday, and there will be a moment when my son will want to get to know his father.
Even in that worst-case scenario at the core, nothing has changed.
I am who I amโan innocent soul with good intentions, unmoved by circumstance. No matter where the world places me, I will continue forward. I will not falter.
I feel unburdened, freed from fear and uncertainty.
Everything that once seemed permanent, I now understand can be stripped away in an instant. And yet, in that realization, I have found a strange peace, more solid than ever before.
How ironic that it took being confined to this cold, bare cell in Breda for me to see it.
I have to wait quite sometime before the door opens, after a quick shower I am handed the clothes my Faf brought. How the man must worry, he normally does not show it but I know he does...
I heard it in his voice during that call. I hate that he has gotten involved, but on the other hand, it makes sense. He has always been there in my time of need.
The brands are his, not mine, yet they exude a quiet strength, a presence that settles over me like armor.
With a straight back and my crown chakra tingling, I walk out of that cell.
There is still a sense of this divine consciousness I felt this morning. I have nothing to conceal, and I will make that known. Not with defiance, but with the confidence of someone who has nothing to fear.
Fear and worries have been holding me back forever, while they protected me from the worst they closed me off from feeling inner peace.
Accompanied by my lawyer I walk into the room and sit down before the examining magistrate, dressed in the clean clothes my father bought for me, I feel nothing but certainty.
Next Chapter Coming in Two Days
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