This digital age had made love a different kind of adventure. Way back, relationships had a certain kind of process, like you meet someone at a wedding, in church, on your street, or through a mutual friend. You exchange glances, then numbers, become friends then gradually build something real. But now, just one DM, or video call, you’re in a relationship with someone miles away, someone you may never have even met in person. I think it should be called "love on screen", everything is been done on screen, chat, voice notes, late night video calls and all, well to me, its of many side, It’s beautiful, its confusing and its ridiculous.
There was a time my cousin first told me she was in a relationship with someone she met on Facebook. I laughed, just a profile picture, some sweet words and you fell in love, are you for real, that was my question to her and her response was that I wouldn't understand, and I just smiled. She told me they talk every day, and that he knows him better than some people she sees in person, well I still find it hard to believe. One time, she was at my place and they started this conversation, I was glad I could cook, I cooked, did everything and they were still on calk, they were even using me to catch cruise, then she invited me over and I saw it, I saw how they looked at each other, how he spoke to her, how she laughed like a teen in love, well, sincerely, with what I saw, It was real. Even though they were in different states, technology has indeed helped them.
And thats the thing about relationships this day, distance isn’t as scary as it used to be. Before, long-distance relationships was for the extra strong, you would write letters and wait for weeks to get a reply, if no response comes, you become worried, and wonder if the person still remembered you. But now, with a tap on your phone, you can see your partner’s face, hear their voice, even watch them eat and all. It has made love easier but also more complicated.
Social media for example is where many relationships start, but it’s also where many relationships end. The same Instagram, Facebook, WhatsApp and all that makes one happy with ones partner are the same platform that might show you things you never wanted to see. Fights now start over ordinary blue ticks and last-seen. Reading message without response, being online and not texting is now the cause of a lot of relationship issues. Whereas these small things didn’t even exist in our parents time.
Not to talk of online dating or dating apps, meeting a complete stranger on the internet and deciding they might be “the one”. Though, I know people who have met their soulmates on dating apps, but I also know people who were scammed, lied to, or even ghosted by someone they thought was the love of their life. It’s just too risky. You never really know if the person on the other end is who they say they are. People have fallen in love with profiles that were completely fake, loving a fantasy that never actually existed.
And, am not blaming technology, yes technology is not the enemy. It has played a very significant role in helping relationships in ways we can’t deny. Communication is faster, clearer, and more frequent. We don’t have to wait weeks for letters or travel miles just to say “I love you".We can now express love in various new ways, we can order surprise gifts, or make video compilations of sweet memories. Our parents didn’t have that luxury, maybe just radio shoutouts to express self to partner.
Here's a short question, as it was what happened to me, I knew a friend back then, we were very close, we became besties, we shared literally everything, I mean , I happen to know what she wears, where she is and all, we keep each other updated, then suddenly she went off, her mobile wasn't going, she was the only child, no siblings, how do I reach her, searched all her media handles, she was off...if it was a relationship, dating relationship, what would have happened, though we almost graduated to that. How do you know what happens to the other partner, how do you know they did not just leave you, how would you know they are good and fine,...how?
Now, seeing what causes breakups are things you just feel like, what, just a text, just because she did not pick up. Some even find out they’ve been dumped when their partner suddenly stops replying to messages, ghosting is now seem as a normal thing. And cheating, well technology has made it easier too. Someone can be in a committed relationship and still have an entire second life online, entertaining other people in secret.
If love is better or not is not something I can answer though, cause we all have different perspective of it. For those who knows their way through the digital world without letting it ruin emotions, it’s a blessing to them as it helps them keep love alive even when distance tries to kill it. But for those who rely too much on technology without putting in real effort, it can mar such relationship. I believe love hasn't changed but the way we express it has.
What really matters either online or in person is the effort being put into it. Technology can only assist and not replace love. We must not forget what love is really all about.
Posted Using INLEO