The past week was quiet intense with a explorations and depths within myself.
Remembering
My week started with a deep and long chat online with a woman, who touched me deeply. Our astrology, our human design are complementary and it seemed to be a perfect fit. Although we are worlds apart, I felt a very deep connection, one I hardly recognized.
As a spiritual being with lots of memories of past lives. Here on earth I have a suit of flesh and blood, including the memories I have experienced in this live. I noticed something got planted or activated about a certain live we shared together. A planet in our solar system, which was a home to me.
In the few regressions I had. I remembered living on this planet with a wife and daughter. Till the day came, I got called for a mission. A mission on earth. Like many Starseeds, I joined and reincarnated on earth to join the battle, using my gifts and abilities. My loving wife and daughter I had to leave behind, in the hope to meet them again on our home planet.
But what if they got incarnated here as well? What if the woman I was talking to was my wife on that planet?
A lot of feelings got mixed, what is the truth? Is there even a truth? To make it even more complex, she had an experience that touched a deeper layer in herself. One that shocked and confused her. What did she experienced, was it an program , an illusion or someone throwing her off guard and telling lies? No matter what happened she experienced a lot of emotional pain.
For me this was a reason to believe something 'big' was going on. Not everybody gets attacked like that, only if there's a big lesson or activation. Due to speaking with different languages and not being physical near each other, it's difficult to explain what is happening. Sensing the other is difficult at this stage. What is true and what isn't?
She was triggered and got triggered as well. I used to have the co-depend "rescuer" program running and my "I am not OK" program is somewhere on the sideline. Trying to wrestle between those two and my own experience about energetic attacks, let's say I didn´t get much better.
After a few days she decided to let me go. Which I found very hard. Letting go because of fear, guilt or shame.. isn´t for me the right way to split ways. Here come's the complementary part as well. I tried to explain that it isn´t her fault, that what 'they' said wasn´t true. In my quest to talk her out of it it. I forgot her need, maybe she needed some time to process or maybe she doesn't want to be involved.
Her choice I needed to respect and I had to let her go. Even if my truth wasn´t hers.
Thank you dear for this important lesson and know, when the time is right we will meet again :-)
My first client
This week I had my first client. She wasn't a total stranger to me, we met a few years ago during a study we followed. We scheduled a meeting at her house. My whole trip to meeting was kinda special as well. I got worried about not having a mobile table to treat her, I've one at home. So should I rent a car or how am I gonna do this? Checking several times with my higher self "I had to let go, everything is arranged".. Well that's hopeful, I thought, we will see how this is going to end up.
So I took the train and she picked me up from the station. We went to her house and she said she had a Reiki table... I was like.. "oh cool! That would help me a lot" :-) Thank you universe!
We did setup the table in the living room and I started to do my thing. My first notice was "she is well connected, nothing seems out of balance". Which was a bit strange as she really had some physical and mental challenges. I decided to "go on a exploration", there had to be something that is withholding her, that kept her home and not doing what she wants to do. It took me some effort, but I found a little memory she kept very deep inside her. She maybe even locked it away. We talked about it, and it was difficult to let go. She had done several treatments about this subject and it still was there. I suggested to schedule another appointment especially for this subject that needed attention.
On a first meeting a prefer an overall treatment. Every person and every body is different. The client nor I do know what we are going to experience.
For me this is an experience about how to shield myself, ground myself and do what I need to do.
Thank you my client for this experience!
Tenaga Dalam
My experience later the week with a Dukun, is a story on it self.
https://peakd.com/lifestyle/@timothyleecress/heritage-tenaga-dalam
Last day of the week
This morning I decided to go for a bike ride and let me guide by my intuition (as I thought).
I went over the dike, through a park, short stop at a store for some supplies and continued my ride.
The whole ride was about integrating the past week. I felt a very deep connection with someone, I found it very difficult to find a truth with all the believes, desires and projections, a spirit left my body and I had some other challenges about finding the truth.
The whole ride I was guided. Take a right here, take a left there, straight on and so on. Till I heard a voice. A memory of my mother. "Tim you said you wanted to go here, now we are here and you want to go home. That's not going to happen. You stay we drove all the way here for you".
That voice, that memory woke me up and I understood what I was doing. I was following orders, without following myself. In conversations I can talk a lot, about 'nothing'. Most of them are distractions from what's inside me. This lesson was about. If I need something, I need to stay clear without distractions from myself. I need to stay with my truth, my own gut feeling.
To sum up.
It was an intense week about finding my truth and letting go of it, letting go of people and letting go of certain parts that didn´t belong to me. No matter what the other believes, what his or her truth is. Receive them as their truth. Have compassion for yourself and for the other.
Thank you for joining me journey!
Timothy
